Deep in the Test Lab bunker, Professor Nigel Beerstein PhD (Phony Doctor) is tinkering with Humulus lupulus - that’s nerd for hops.

He’s rocking out to some 80’s synth pop when the ground begins to shake, his specimen jars begin to jiggle. There’s thunder, then lightning (the way you love me is frightening?) then - LIGHTS OUT! His lab is plunged into darkness.

‘Dammit,’ he thinks to himself, feeling about for his infrared welding helmet, ‘the BOOMBOX 9000 has blown the breakers again.’

In the inky black, out of the corner of his eye, The Prof notices that the seeds of Hopsonica have begun to glow. ‘It’s not the boombox, it’s the seeds… the seeds are ALIVE!’ he exclaims.

The seeds of Hopsonica are an ancient strain of hops infused with the power of ‘the brown note’ - a sonic force so powerful it can render whole planets silent, which can really muck up family gatherings, or improve them, depending on your family. The seeds were gifted to Prof Beerstein by a wise Aztec Witch Doctor named Tonto Holmes - but that’s another story for another can…

ANYWAY! This means one of two things! Either the aliens have arrived and Prof can finally brew the world’s first MILF (Massive Intergalactic Lactic Fermentation) beer, or…

…or The Nelson Council are on their way over to serve him with another noise complaint.